A tragic, yet beautiful day....

Farewell my dear friend... Friday was a long day. I do not believe I have Ever cries so many tears in one day as I did this past friday....

We dropped Quinn off at my moms in the morning and headed to the Airdrie cemetery where Dave's ashes were to be put away. It was a beautiful day. Family and a few close friends only.

Darcy did an amazing job. Caleb (3.5 yrs old) was on his best behavior (all day I might ad).

The ceremony was moving... after wards we headed to their church for the service. We were absolutely honored to be considered family - given the privilege of being with and sitting with the family.

Kevin was there as he worked with Dave and knows a few of his friends. It was so nice to see his face and get his hugs; especially for Lawrence. I was good to see My pillar of strength hold onto his as he hugged Kevin...

The service was very well done. Planned by Dave I might ad... I bawled through the whole thing... a few times I wondered if I would be able to get myself back in control. Immense waves of emotions through out... After the service was a Tea at the church.

We picked up Quinn then stopped at Kevin & Katie's before the wake. As per Dave's request, Darcy held a Wake/Shindig at their place the night of the funeral. It was actually a lot of fun. It was tough at first, but I held my composure, as did Darcy. Many drinks were had. Food was eaten. Stories told. Man, we told/heard many many good Dave stories! We ended up staying over. The night finally ended around 2 am...

We went for breakfast with close friends of Dave. Solem, but nice.


This has been a weird death to process, as it has been the first one where we had warning - not that it made it any easier. When we got word, we were honestly relieved for him as we know how much pain and suffering he endured. He has left a legacy with a gorgeous wife and 2 beautiful boys. We are thankful to be a big part of theirs lives...

Darcy was proud to announce that his corneas were donated and transplanted a few days ago.

We didn't know how o tell Quinn so have been mulling it over/procrastinating. A few times yesterday en route to breakfast he asked where Uncle Dave was and I sluffed it off not ready to answer. So last night after dinner, we went and sat down at the computer and watched our 'Lymburner' photo file. We then sat down and told Quinn. We tried our best to leave is as simple as possible. In time if he asks about death we will expand on the explanations. So for now, in brief, we both started crying pretty hard. He was worried why we were so upset. We told him that we were sad because Uncle Dave passed away; that he had the bad Cancer and has died.... We were sad because we would never ever ever get to see him again. He asked where he was and we said he was gone, but now he is in our hearts. We explained that Caleb & Noah do not have a daddy now. And that Auntie does not have her husband. Because he has passed away and is now in our hearts. Quinn actually seemed to understand (?) what we were saying. He told us that we need to give hugs and kisses to Auntie & the boys, that we need to play with them so they are not sad.... So I think that went well.

A few hours later, when I tucked him into bed, he came downstairs about a 1/2 hr later crying. He said he was so sad that me & Lair were so sad. It took a big family cuddle and some gentle words before he was ready to go to sleep.

I woke up quite depressed today but tried to hide it as best as I could. My heart aches for Darcy & the boys. I pray for them for much strength to start their new lives without Dave...

A dream with Dave.

I dreamt I was in a church gym or something, at a dinner fundraiser for Pediatric medicine.

We were at a long table. At the very end was Dave (healthy). Sitting there looking at Darcy, who was to my left. She wasn't paying attention. I didn't see that anything was out of the ordinary at this point.

Everyone was given a song sheet and everyone started to sing a hymn for the babies.

I just stared at the page - I didn't want to sing. I was too sad to sing.

I could hear Darcy singing, very well.

I felt a Pain of sadness in my heart and was thinking 'How can she sit here and sing???'....

Then she stopped and just started to sob and cry....

I felt such sadness, my heart twisted missing Dave - I looked up from my song sheet and He was gone. It was just me and a distraught Darcy...

I woke up crying... =(

We lost a good friend today... R.I.P. Dave.

Good bye my dear friend, we will miss you so much.

David "Dave" Mark Lymburner of Calgary lost his courageous battle with cancer on Friday May 22, 2009. He was surrounded by his loving wife, Darcy Lymburner and a few close friends. While Dave's time with us was far too brief, he touched many lives. Dave leaves behind his wife of 6 years, Darcy and his two beautiful sons, Caleb(3) and Noah (1), his parents, Lorne and Sharlene and brother, Jeff. Dave will also be lovingly remembered by his extended family and many close friends."Friendship is the only choice in life you can make that is yours. We chose each other". The many of us with whom Dave chose to share his life feel truly blessed.Funeral arrangements are pending and will be announced as soon as finalized. Tentative date of Friday May 29, 2009.



Darcy has lost her husband this day, while mourning the loss of her father who passed away on wednesday. His funeral will be on tuesday....




=(

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In a Funk - and not the fun butt shaking kind.

So, I've been in a bit of a funk. There are a few things I can attribute to the way I've been feeling, but I just can't shake it. Crazy moods swings, wanting to be chipper but having a hard time pulling it out from within.

Went to the Dr. today for routine visit - talked to him a bit about it. Thankfully he's not quick to prescribe chemicals. I have some ideas on how to work around things and I'll give it a few weeks to see if things change. If they don't - I think I will consult with a Naturopath before going back to the doctor. I just feel out of balance...

I'm thinking this trip to Vegas will certainly be a quick temporary fix. Lair and I have not been away together from Quinn since August 2007... In fact, I don't even think we've had a solid 24 hours away together Quinnless - so this is LONG overdo and very very needed for us.

I need to focus on myself a bit; Need to start doing Yoga again at home. We are going to look at our finances and see if we can sign up at the Gym. In the grand sceam of things, It's very reasonable - IF we utalize the facility (w/ childminding!). I think it would be a very positive step toward inner happiness for myself - not to mention it would be nice to have a smoking hot body to go with my awesome personality! LOL ;-)


Lots to think about. Lots to commit to. lots to do.

We're going to VEGAS!

So it wasn't a hassle afterall! Lair filled out his forms, got his pics and headed to a passport office in the Deep South. For and extra $30 he will have it in his hands on or before next friday.

We leave May 24!

Bowling, frozen Yogurt and the merry go round

Bowling, frozen yogurt and the merry go round. That pretty much sums our terrific afternoon.

Lair is pulling MAJOR over time right now - like 40 hours OT. Today (day 10 of 21 in a row) he needed to get out and about to feel like he's had a day off. So we decided to go to Chinook Centre & take Quinn Bowling as He's never done it. It was fun. Played one game, had the gutter rails in (even with the rails we still only bowled 100! lol).

Afterwards went for frozen Yogurt, then took Quinn on the Merry go round. Lucky for me I didn't get dizzy!


It was a nice afternoon that's for sure :)



Lair and I want to go to Vegas - we've been talking about it for years. We've both been, but not together. We figure his over time will cushion a trip, he wanted to go after this crazy long haul stint. We got the time off, Lairs mom said she'd watch Quinn, we were planning the trip, narrowing down what special to jump on..... but, Lair's passport is expired.

DOH! Not worth the hassle trying to get a passport in one week with a stat holiday.

Repect.

Went to see Dave today. I arrived to not one, but Two signs saying No visitors and family only.

I talked to a nurse about it and she said he has very specific instructions for Darcy Only.... I honor and respect that, however it does make me sad.

Talking to a close friend of his yesterday, he said he's had moments (very few and far between) of alertness. In this alertness is coming reality hitting him like an acme mallet. Friends from all over BC, AB & Sask are converging on his little room. I believe, when he's not sleeping or sedated that he is having a hard time emotionally, which is to be expected!

I can't even fathom myself in his situation; I just wish I could go hold him.



Darcy, whose father is still on the brink of passing (was expected to pass a few weeks ago) is still hanging on. Only time will tell for Dave; and she just got word that a friend/co-worker was killed in a car accident. Their funeral is friday. She plans to attend. In my humble opinion, I do not think it's a good idea for her to go...

My strength is beaming out to her at quadruple warp speed. I hope she absorbs it and it helps her get through one more day.

I said my goodbyes.

We saw Dave on Thursday. He is not responding to pain and is pretty much in a Coma - BUT, I know he can hear us, he does have a subtle reaction to touch and voice.

I had my cuddles, bathed him in all the love and energy that I could muster and said my goodbyes. I know he could hear me. His eyebrows raise, he tried opening his eyes, he squeezed me hand, and I know he was trying to talk. I wish I knew what he wanted to say.

I treated this visit as if it were the last, just in case; by the next visit, he may slip farther away I wanted him to hear what I had to say; wishing I said it 4 days prior when he was up and walking and alert. Regardless, I am at Peace with saying everything I said to him, and if/when I see him again, I will say more...

I just wish I could have him wrap his arms around me one more time and hear him say 'hey kiddo - I love you'.

Firsts and lasts.

Last thursday Quinn and I headed to Edmonton.

Before we left, while Quinn was in school I stopped in to see Dave, knowing her would be moved to the Hospice soon - this visit was defiantly different. I spent about an hour there. I had a chance to say some things I wanted to say. Then we just held hands and cuddled...

Our drive was great, Quinn travels so well! We got to watch Maxmillion play in a Lacrosse game. Afterwards, Albert (and all his awesomeness) watched the kids and Ursula & I had a few Martini's then headed downtown to meet her classmates to celebrate year end exams as DONE.

We went to a nice pub (The Druid) and slammed a few drinks/shots. We had an outrageous conversation with some 20 year old boys and we knew the evening was just beginning.

We then went to a Top 40 (?) bar with the classmates. Did I mention the majority of these students are 18-20!? lol More shots for the ladies! In fact, enough shots to get us out on the dance floor. Ursula and I had a blast. Too much fun!

We got home around midnight (?) and woke up Albert. He and I ended up staying up all night gabbing while Ursula passed out. HOW much did she drink?! Who knows, but she deserved every ounce... errr., Litre(s)!


Friday day was a write off. We laid low. Hung out. They let me nap most of the day! (Bless their souls). Friday night was ladies night - 11 of us went for dinner and had great time and great food.
Quinn had his first open flame roasted hotdog and his first ROASTED MARSHMALLOW! He loved them!

Saturday we spent all day outside -I believe it hit 24 degrees! Man I wish we had a yard like the Parenteau's!! Nice to be able to run around! Quinn rode his first two wheel bike with training wheels! We're going to buy him one soon! He loved it! I almost wept a few times watching my baby do such a big boy thing!

People started arriving through out the day, as evening set we had a great BBQ and Albert started the fire pit. Since Quinn was outside all day - he went to bed with no problems and I chillaxed! Another great evening surrounded by wicked peeps and hilarious conversations. I actually went to bed early (1:30am!) as I was wiped from all the merry making and knew I still had to drive home.

Sunday we were up and gone by noon.



Seeing Dave in the Hospice really brings it home. The visits are getting shorter and shorter; so far he's been up and alert (always a blessing) but I've just been told he is rapidly deteriorating... We're off tonight as well; I don't even know if he will be conscious; nor if he ever will be... =(